Wednesday, September 19, 2012


Why You Should Be Kind to Yourself

By Marissa Håkansson


What does the word 'kindness' mean to you? I feel thatkindness starts with ourselves. It is an essential expression of self-love that warms our whole being through compassionate support.

For me, when I am genuinely kind towards myself, I build self-trust and inner strength. It allows me to feel cared for and looked after regardless of the external circumstances I am in. And it is the foundation from which I can experience true freedom and a deep peacefulness within my heart.

Self-kindness can be experienced by:
  • caring for the whole of who we are, physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually
  • listening to our bodies, and being honest with what we truly need in each moment
  • showing ourselves love, acceptance and forgiveness through all of our experiences
  • being gentle towards ourselves in our thoughts, feelings, actions and behaviors.
Through kindness, we gently dissolve any negative energy and destructive patterns we are experiencing, creating space for the essence of who we are to shine through more fully in our lives.

And once we have cultivated kindness within ourselves, genuinely extending kindness to others becomes effortless. We can give our love freely and demonstrate understanding with ease, even those we don't know personally. Because what we see within ourselves, we see in everyone around us. When we feel love and kindness in ourselves, we notice love and kindness in others.

So, here's a question to consider. How often do you relate to yourself with kindness?
on some days but not others?
  • only when you've done something to deserve it?
  • if someone gives you permission?
  • most of the time?
  • all of the time?
  • you're not sure?
How would your relationship with your self change if you were openly and generously kind towards yourself, without conditions? How would it impact on your relationships with others?
Everyone has the capacity to treat themselves with kindness. Because kindness is formed out of our loving and giving nature. It is who we are. Existing at our very core.

So I invite you to notice, where in your life could you extend a little more kindness towards yourself?
Published January 10, 2012 at 11:00 AM
About Marissa Håkansson
Marissa Håkansson is a lifestyle strategist and transformative coach who helps women reconnect with their authentic self, awaken a deep-sense of inner wellbeing, and create space in their life to be who they truly are. Marissa is the creator of The Nourished Life Project (an initiative to support 100 women across the globe create their most nourishing life) and loves exploring how we can cultivate greater connection, depth and meaning in every aspect of our lives.
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